No matter what field you’re in, workplace conflict is inevitable. Conflict can be a valuable catalyst for organizational growth when handled respectfully, but we all know it isn’t always handled in the best ways. Regardless of the individual conflict, how you handle the strife says a lot about your decision-making, tact, and soft skills, so it isn’t uncommon for questions surrounding past conflict to arise in an interview.
When asked about how you’ve handled past conflicts, interviewers aren’t looking to spill the tea and get your former workplace’s gossip. These types of questions are your chance to show how you handle stressful or high-stakes situations and highlight the types of skills you’ll be bringing to the new organization. Paint an accurate picture and cut to the heart of the resolution by framing your answer correctly.
Stick to the important details
When choosing your scenario, keep two thoughts in mind: that the situation is something you can relate to the role you’re interviewing for and that you don’t lose focus by contextualizing the story so much. This question allows interviewers to see the decisions you made and the skills you used to handle the situation. Getting too bogged down in irrelevant details risks the interviewer losing interest.
Indeed says to try to find an example that aligns with the role you’re applying for. If the example is something where a similar situation can occur at this company, it paints a tangible picture of how you’ll react. With that story in mind, focus only on the details that matter. For you, the minute details might matter more, but a hiring manager just needs the core facts.
“First, identify and describe as concisely as possible the situation. Then discuss the approach you took to addressing it. Finally, describe the positive resolution that you were able to achieve.” –Goldie Chan, Forbes
Use a framework
To limit your details to the meat and bones of the story and stay on track, consider utilizing a framework. Not only does this provide better pacing for your example but it makes sure every component has a place in the greater narrative. Many experts recommend the STAR method (Situation, Task, Action, Results) but the CAR method (Challenge, Action, Result) is becoming more popular as well. Check out our guides on both and see what feels right for you!
Either method allows you to quickly summarize the situation (be sure to illustrate both schools of thought rather than just your own to show a full understanding of the situation), show the concrete actions you took, and leave space to discuss the results. Lorgarithm also says that adapting your example into a framework takes a potentially negative moment in your life and better frames it as a teachable moment.
Focus on results
Both STAR and CAR make a point of allowing you space to explore the result your actions achieved. Did you successfully resolve the conflict at hand? The actions you personally took and the results are what the interviewer really cares about. If they just wanted fun conflict stories to follow, they could get them from other media.
The Muse’s Richard Moy says that a common mistake many job seekers make is getting more absorbed in the conflict itself rather than the resolution. When you’re heavily tied to the situation, it can be hard to take a step back and be objective. But you must do so to tell the story objectively and let the results be the star. You aren’t there to rant but to express your value to a new organization.
Stay positive
Some conflicts are higher stakes than others, but when you’re personally involved, you’ll likely have some strong feelings on the matter regardless. The deeper you were involved, the better the story can ultimately be, but you must remain impersonal and focus on the positives. Laying out the facts as they are and keeping things positive are the best ways to impress the interviewer with your answer.
Forbes’ Goldie Chan says to focus on the positives by avoiding mentioning specific examples of bad behavior by some parties and explaining the satisfactory result that was achieved, ultimately creating as positive of an outcome for everyone involved as possible. Make sure not to let negative language cloud the story. And finally, while we can learn valuable lessons from failure, it’s best to choose an example where you succeeded and had a positive outcome to make you a more attractive candidate.
“Avoid using emotional or negative language as this may make you seem unreasonable or difficult to work with.” –Berkley Group
Wrap up
Adroitly handling conflict shows off important soft skills like active listening, empathy, communication, problem-solving, emotional intelligence, teamwork, and leadership. Knowing how to get to the heart of the question without getting bogged down in the details and showing achievable results while keeping a cool head will highlight the importance of your past conflicts. By effectively answering these types of questions, you’ll show off your soft skills and highlight why you’re the right person for this organization.
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